Aahhhh, Sunday night and kids are in bed. Today was a day of sunshine and soapsuds and clean cars. In lieu of a big fancy bbq dinner for Fathers' Day I washed Andy's cars instead --ooOOO I windexed the windshields and windows too. Kids "helped" by playing in the suds and eating otter pops.

I could almost ignore the pile of ironing that needs tending to... but not for much longer, the closet is bereft of short-sleeved shirts, and in this oh-it's-summer-already? weather I need a good supply of those on hand. Not to mention this is the last week of normalcy before the world grinds to a halt for our church's vacation Bible school. Just write off anything productive THAT week, lemmetellya.

best way to pass time as you iron: talk to God. Pretend He's sitting on the couch while you work. It's very interesting. God and I iron clothes together. Give it a try sometime.

5 days until the new Harry Potter comes out. Figures it will be the day before vacation Bible school. Guess who's gonna be staying up all night to read it? :O) yeeeep. I will be sure to get all the laundry and meals done in advance so i can live on popcorn and quarts of water.

POPCORN. good ideeee. then God and I will iron.

Nighty!

What do I think? I think that moms desperately need more personal time. This mom does, anyway. But when when when? Get the kids safely off to bed, and I'm whipped myself. Can't sit at the computer during the day or the house goes to Sheol in a coracle. BUT IF I Turn on the one-eyed-monster to serve as a babysitter--NOW WE'RE TALKING!

So right now the kids are watching Kipper the Dog whilst I sit here and do nothing. very cool.

Kite flying was on the agenda for the afternoon, so Andy took the kids over to Aylen Jr Hi and tried to catch any passing breezes with varying degrees of success. My mission: hit the bank and deposit this month's piano lessons income, then get a portable buzz from the nearest Martin Henry's coffee. Turbo mocha for me; decaf vanilla latte for Andy. I'm ready to go running for 3 miles now!

Spring is in the air, and sandals are on the feet. D has outgrown his so off to Wal-Mart, that Bastion of American Frumpery On Display, to purchase some cheap teva rip-offs.

Ok, so a whole year goes by since last posting...
I still have a sense of restraint, writing here. LOL if I would DO IT more often it wouldn't be such a challenge. The unfamiliarity of it all chafes.
May 3 I have a speaking engagement for a Mother's Day Tea. The theme is from the Gospel of John, Chapter 4 - The Samaritan woman meeting Jesus at the well. Noooooooooo problem, right? we'll see. I seem to want to tie in the thought from Jeremiah where God says to the prophet regarding Israel something like "Do you see my people Israel?? Do you see what they've done? They've forsaken ME, and hewed themselves broken cisterns that hold no water!"
We of today try to fill our lives with things other than God Himself - we keep striving for significance, for satisfaction - and continually fail to acquire these things. God means to fill us with Himself, and we will not be content otherwise. All else is a chasing of the wind, bringing nothing real or lasting.
Mr Rodgers used to quote the verse from Psalm 34 - "O taste and see that the Lord is good!" To so many of us, however, God is just an ideal, a vague concept that we know we ought to respect and worship - but to Taste? to See? Wasn't it Alexander Pope who said something along the lines of "A little knowledge is a dangerous thing/Drink deeply, or taste not of that ____(something)__ spring." (Me and my vague recollections).
I think in our culture we've conditioned ourselves to be satisfied with the soundbites, the fast-food version of everything. The discipline needed to "drink deeply" just isn't cultivated anymore. I too struggle with this! This "instant, now, immediately, or I'm going somewhere else" mentality. Relationships fade, or otherwise are so shallow that they don't reach past the surface to the living material within.
Drink deeply. Taste and see. Depth takes time. Must ponder this more in weeks to come.

I find it utterly amazing sometimes how fast time goes. A blast from my past showed up in my email inbox last night, to my great delight. 14 years is a long time, humanly speaking~the incredible changes that take place from age 17 to age 32. It's like a completely different person knew Shane, and was known by him. I wonder--the people I loved to be with back then, would I still love to be with them now that we are older? Have our tastes and interests changed so drastically that we could no longer find common ground to talk and laugh about, other than that Great Illusion known as The Past?

Another friend from high school called me tonight (he had received the same email I did)-- and we still have much to laugh and talk about (yes, even about that Great Illusion, The Past). Though I don't know if Wally really counts; we've kept in pretty good contact over the years since high school. It about killed me to go to a different college than he did, but God knew best, as always.

As we talked about The Past, I gained greater insight into mutual friends long fallen by the wayside; people who used to matter so very much to me, but I never completely understood why they made the foolish choices they did. He, having a different perspective, was able to fill in some gaps. Perhaps the Past is best understood when shared with others; I find that I lose perspective about myself and others when I try to recall things on my own. He gave me a gift tonight: He told me I was the first person to straighten him out about why people kept asking him about his boots ("Wally, they don't really want to know. Don't answer them."). When I recall what I was like at 13, I shudder. It was all about me - clawing my way to acceptance - hence, security - at any price, it seemed. But tonight he affirmed me. I looked out for him when he was new, in a new place. The thought warmed me that maybe, just maybe, I had done one thing worthwhile out of all the mistakes I made as a friend.

My heart is full. My heart is overflowing on a good theme? I'm not sure where that Scripture is found. But I'm so grateful for friends from The Past. They knew me when, yet they still love me now. What a precious thing! Something not to treat callously. And so maybe enough time has passed...maybe enough has gone on over the last year, with 911 and Alvaro's death...maybe it's time to reunite as a group. *shuddering with fear* I can only hope that 15 years has taken the sting away of some of the bitter things that occurred. If not...well, I am a living testimony that God is able to make huge changes in a life. Those who walk in pride, He is able to humble, and that I know painfully and gratefully well. It's a lesson I need constant retesting on, also! Whatever others may think of the Me of The Past - I know who I am NOW. Fundamentally the same; but radically altered. I'm freed to be who I am, in a way I could not be when I was 17. Not that I speak as one who has "arrived," mind you, but that I've learned, in some small way, to let go and let God be and do all within me. I don't have to scrabble for some elusive position or rank on an arbitrary pecking order. I am accepted in the Beloved, and He gave all and humbled Himself. When I am striving to be changed into His image, being holy as He is--these other things pale in comparison with His transcendent glory.

I know who I am.

Do you know who you are?

And here I had made all these grandiose plans to have a blog on my geocities web site, only to learn that they will be stopping FTP to non-paying accounts. Money talks...and it's rather quiet around my house, thank you very much. Ah well!

It's rather daunting to think that someone else will occasionally read this. It makes me think I have to be witty and brilliant, when I am rarely either. I'm ok with that. I think.

Today I began to conquer the remaining vestiges of turf in my front yard, so I can create a haven for my David Austen roses. My two preschool kidlets regarded this as an opportunity to get the feel of good, clean mud between their toes. We all had a good time until they discovered the joys of throwing mud balls at each other, my white car, the front porch... The Good Time is Now Over, I announced. I enjoyed hosing them off afterwards with the glacially-tempered water that flows from my hoses this time of year. Wonder why they howled and screamed? It was just water. Afterward we warmed up inside with macaroni and cheese.

Now that they are in bed, I find myself wanting to make some popcorn and watch a movie with my husband. Popcorn is a guaranteed free-for-all, confetti-type party food for my kidlets; hence, I make it after they are in bed. Get thee to a microwave!